Why I created Transformative Therapy
When people come to therapy, they usually want one thing: to get rid of suffering.
They want less anxiety. Less depression. Less OCD. Less panic. Less pain.
And that is completely understandable. When a person suffers, they want the suffering to end.
Still, I think modern psychology often makes a mistake here.
Too many therapeutic approaches understand mental health as the removal of symptoms. As a return to normal. As reaching a state in which nothing troubles a person.
But what if that goal is too small?
What if the real goal is not only to suffer less, but to become a better person?
What if the goal is growth?
When symptoms disappear
Imagine two people.
The first person gets rid of anxiety. Panic attacks stop. Avoidance fades. The symptoms recede.
The second person reaches the same result. But in addition, they become braver. More disciplined. Wiser. They learn to carry responsibility. They begin to care for their relationships. They begin to build a meaningful life.
Both are healthier than before.
But they are not in the same place.
The first person returned to where they were.
The second person was transformed.
And this transformation is what interests me.
Transformation instead of return
My own path did not begin in psychology textbooks.
It began in suffering.
For most of my life I struggled with OCD, anxiety, depressive periods and endless overthinking. Like many other people, I believed for a long time that happiness would arrive once all problems disappeared.
But life does not work that way.
Every person will suffer.
Every person will experience loss.
Every person will face uncertainty.
Every person will one day die.
So the question is not how to remove suffering completely.
The question is what kind of person we become because of it.
Amor Fati
One of the most important concepts that shaped my view of therapy is the Stoic idea of Amor Fati.
Love of fate.
Not merely enduring life.
Not resignation.
Not passive acceptance.
But the ability to say: “I would not have chosen this at first, but it happened. And I will create something good from it. Life sent me this challenge, and I will say yes to it.”
A person with Amor Fati does not look for a way to escape reality.
They look for a way to transform it into growth.
That does not mean we should love pain itself.
It means loving the possibility that pain offers us.
The possibility of becoming stronger, wiser and more compassionate.
The six pillars of transformation
This is why Transformative Therapy was born.
It is not just a method for reducing symptoms.
It is a model of personal growth built on six pillars.
Insight
Learning to distinguish between who we truly are and what our mind is telling us in a particular moment.
Acceptance
Stopping the endless war against our own emotions. Stopping all the different kinds of compulsive behavior through which we usually run away from anxiety, but also from other emotions we do not want to accept and are afraid of.
Warrior
Developing the courage to act despite fear and the desire to kick your disorder’s ass.
Life
Building a life worth living — relationships, work, health, mission and joy.
Flexibility
Questioning destructive beliefs and learning to look at the world with more psychological flexibility.
Existentialism
Finding meaning even in the face of suffering, uncertainty and our own mortality. Finding meaning even in what is painful. Finding Amor Fati.
Mental health as a path
I think mental health is not a goal.
It is a by-product.
A by-product of a life lived courageously.
A by-product of a character that learns to grow.
A by-product of a person who stops waiting for perfect conditions and starts acting today.
We are not here to become flawless.
We are here to become better.
And sometimes the suffering we resist the most becomes the gateway to the greatest transformation of our life.
This is the idea on which Transformative Therapy stands.
Not merely healing.
Transformation.
I will share more posts on this blog soon. Come back from time to time, and I believe new essays will keep appearing here. And hopefully, eventually, there will also be an option to subscribe, so the next essay can arrive straight in your inbox, hehe.